dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
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