let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
