its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
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