Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
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