We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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