Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
Randomize
