My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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