love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Randomize
