Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Randomize
