I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
love makes seman taste better
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
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