How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
