he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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