if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
