Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
We just shotgunned beers for America
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
