If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize