There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Are we still banned from the library?
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize