not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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