she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
