Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
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