There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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