Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
