Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
