so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
