Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
