When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
