ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
did i walk over a car last night?
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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