I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
