They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
