He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Randomize
