Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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