She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Randomize