One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
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