i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
