I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
Gay?
German.
Pity.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
