I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
BRING THE BAGELS
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
