i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
