Umm I'm too high to move.
He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
