I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
Randomize