awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
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