she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
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