UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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