We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Randomize
