Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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