You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
And then the night went full on bisexual.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Randomize
