Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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