i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
