i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Randomize
