we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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