I think I am morally bankrupt
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
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