just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
