it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Randomize
